You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
