Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I came so hard my ears popped.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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