Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
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