so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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