Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Randomize