I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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