There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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