I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
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