what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
