Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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