Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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