im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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