I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
