We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
