saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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