i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
