He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
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