you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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