Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
