So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
