I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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