you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
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