Having a random hookup so left but love u
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
