Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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