Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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