did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Randomize
