How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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