Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize