oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
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