It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
