You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
