I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I bet he comes in French.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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