did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I didn't notice because vodka
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
