i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
