I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize