Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
