garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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