laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
