butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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