If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
