nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
