Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
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