you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
