Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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