Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
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450 people also diggin in to funfetti tonight
Good ole' western Massachusetts!
Fun fucking fetti is the best!
Get your ass to a bar and get some cake shots. Then work on getting not single.
While you're at the store getting the funfetti, get a 5lb bag of flour so when you hook up with the drunk guy, he has what he needs to get the job done.
ooohhh very nice use of the classics