The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
