Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
