broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
this will be a night to untag.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I am one with the molecules
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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