that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
If I die, sorry about rent.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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