I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
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Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
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No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.