all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
